Meet the Colors

Have you ever watched the 1990's version of Sabrina, with Harrison Ford? It is about a business tycoon named Linus with seemingly little sense of humor or heart, his handsome and womanizing brother David, and the girl who lives above the garage named Sabrina. I'm not going to go into detail about the movie, however, because I'm not really posting about this movie. I am posting about two scenes in this movie. In the first scene Linus and David are talking in Linus's office. In the middle of the conversation, Linus whips out a gun from his desk and starts firing at a large flat screen television. David is shocked, and we the audience can't suppress a smile. The catch is that the TV screen is indestructible. In another scene in the move, we see Linus trying to sell this TV screen to some Japanese business men. He demonstrates the screen's qualities by beating it with a stick. He then bows over the stick to the Japanese men, offering them a turn to do likewise. Why have I described these scenes to you, do you ask? It is because I want one of those televisions.

Have you ever watched Meet the Colors? For your sake, I hope it wasn't for very long. Meet the Colors is a very educational show in a family of educational DVD's that help young children learn and memorize many useful educational things. My children LOVE them. They love the colors video even though they have known their colors for YEARS. However, what is good for children does not equal good for adults. The method used in these programs to teach children is REPETITION. In a scene from Meet the Colors, a cute little purple puffball floats across the screen painting a purple picture of grapes saying:

purple, purple, purple, purple.......

(the bold letters indicate where the word is emphasized). That is all the little puffballs say. They only say their color. That is the entire dialog for the movie. Over and over and over and.... By about the seventh purple, I'm about ready to pull out a gun and shoot the screen. Unfortunately this would destroy our TV. I would like to buy that indestructible screened TV so that I can have the satisfaction of shooting the colors without actually harming anything. Violent, I know. But you would want to also, I am sure. For some reason I can handle Dora for a very long time, but if I had my way, Meet the Colors would only last for about 2 seconds.

If we are going to have valuable programs that help our children learn their colors, why not also have some programs that make mom personally happy as well? Mine would be called, Meet the Family Rules. It would involve the faces of smiling and adorable cartoon puffballs repeating things like,

"Mommy is always right."
"Mommy is always right."
"Mommy is always right."
"Mommy is always right."

"You must look both ways before crossing the street."
"You must look both ways before crossing the street."
"You must look both ways before crossing the street."
"You must look both ways before crossing the street."

"You cannot eat ice cream out of the carton even though daddy does."
"You cannot eat ice cream out of the carton even though daddy does."
"You cannot eat ice cream out of the carton even though daddy does."
"You cannot eat ice cream out of the carton even though daddy does."

I think it would be a successful venture, except for the fact the the people who make Meet the Colors, Preschool Prep, would probably sue me. It would still be satisfying though......